For a couple of years I wrote an ethics column for the Jewish Week. This week, my Intro to Judaism class is studying ethics. So here is a list of the questions and links for their - and your - convenience. See below for the entire answer to many of the cases.

HAMMERMAN ON ETHICS

Responding To Merry Christmas

12/09/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | JEWISH WEEK ONLINE COLUMNIST | Hammerman on Ethics

Q: It’s that time of year, when everyone everywhere is saying “Merry Christmas” to me, even people who know that I am Jewish. Should I simply smile and repeat the greeting or politely correct the greeter and say, “I’m sorry, I don’t observe Christmas.”

Is Spending To Help The Economy Ethical?

12/02/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | JEWISH WEEK ONLINE COLUMNIST | Hammerman on Ethics

Q: During the holiday season, I keep hearing how important it is for our fragile economy that we buy, buy, buy. If it is patriotic to buy impulsively and consume conspicuously, is it also good?

A: Patriotic: yes. Good…not so much.

Is Turkey Kosher?

11/18/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | JEWISH WEEK ONLINE COLUMNIST | Hammerman on Ethics

Q: I’ve heard that turkey may actually not be kosher. Is that true?

A: From a halachic/ethical standpoint, it is 100% kosher. Or not.

Davening for Dollars

11/10/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | JEWISH WEEK ONLINE COLUMNIST | Hammerman on Ethics

Q: When I daven, I am tempted to ask God for help improving my difficult financial situation. But I always feel this is wrong since so many other people are in worse circumstances involving their health, safety and even worse financial conditions, whereas I at least have a job and a healthy family. Is it unethical to ask God for more money, or should I just be grateful for all the good things I have?

Killing Kaddafy

11/04/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | JEWISH WEEK ONLINE COLUMNIST | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - Was it ethical to kill Muammar Kaddafy and Osama bin Laden on the spot, apparently in cold blood, rather than arrest them and bring them to trial? Didn’t it work for Iraq to try Saddam Hussein?

A – Yes, it was ethical to kill them right then and there.

Are Zoos Ethical?

10/27/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | JEWISH WEEK ONLINE COLUMNIST | Hammerman on Ethics

Q – Given the recent Ohio tragedy involving a private zoo, in which dozens of exotic animals were killed, I was wondering whether it is ethical to have such zoos in the first place.

A Thousand Terrorists for Shalit?

10/11/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | JEWISH WEEK ONLINE COLUMNIST | Hammerman on Ethics

Editor's note: Earlier this year Rabbi Hammerman discussed the ethical implications of exchanging terrorists to save the life of an Israeli soldier. In light of the dramatic news of such a deal emerging from Israel he is revisiting that issue this week.

Q – Is the release of Gilad Shalit worth an exchange of a thousand Hamas prisoners, including some who have blood on their hands and could well kill more innocent Israelis (and others)?

Yom Kippur Reflections

10/06/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | JEWISH WEEK ONLINE COLUMNIST | Hammerman on Ethics

As the Yom Kippur approaches, rather than present a specific ethical quandary I present some reflections and tips on what this holy day can mean for us as we perform the sacred act of engaging with other human beings and with God:

Ethics And The Death Penalty

09/28/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | JEWISH WEEK ONLINE COLUMNIST | Hammerman on Ethics

Q – Was it right for the state of Georgia to execute Troy Anthony Davis?

Fasting Before A Marathon

09/22/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | JEWISH WEEK ONLINE COLUMNIST | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - My brother and I are running the Chicago Marathon which is the day after Yom Kippur. We want to fast, however we have been told that it is unwise to do so the day before running 26 miles. Since this is an ethical dilemma, we need your advice.

A – Well, at the very least, by observing Yom Kippur you could label yourself a “fast runner.” Sorry.

Ethics-ercises in Elul Soul Searching

09/09/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | JEWISH WEEK ONLINE COLUMNIST | Hammerman on Ethics

As we approach the Days of Awe, our annual exercise in self scrutiny and stock-taking can be a daunting task. Rather than highlight a single ethical dilemma this week, I offer here some suggestions, some “ethics-ercises,” as it were, to assist you on this journey.

Postmortem Egg-Freezing And Halacha

09/02/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | JEWISH WEEK ONLINE COLUMNIST | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - A few weeks ago an Israeli court is believed to have made history by being the first to allow parents to extract and freeze the ovarian eggs of their recently deceased daughter. I know that's been done with a man's sperm, but this seems to cross an ethical red line, doesn't it?

Is Harry Potter Anti-Semitic

08/26/2011 | Hammerman on Ethics

Q. When I saw the latest Harry potter film I was appalled at the clear use of anti-Semitic stereotype in depictions of goblin bankers, miserly, hooked nose and all. And this is what we're showing our kids? Isn’t a tacit acceptance of such damaging stereotypes if we ignore them? Shouldn’t Jews be boycotting Harry Potter?

My Worst Enemy's Shiva

08/19/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | JEWISH WEEK ONLINE COLUMNIST | Hammerman on Ethics

Q. The mother of my worst enemy just died and I'm not sure whether to visit during Shiva. In truth, I sincerely see this as a chance to reconcile (we haven't spoken in about five years but have a lot of friends in common). My only concern is that he would misinterpret the reason for the visit and kick me out of the house. I really don't want to cause him any discomfort. What should I do?

Chasing The Mother Bird: A Strange Mitzvah

08/12/2011 | Hammerman on Ethics

Q: An acquaintance of mine recently boasted to me that he had happened upon a bird's nest and seized the opportunity to perform what he considered the mitzvah of shiluach hakan, scaring away a mother bird before taking the eggs. This mitzvah is intended to teach compassion, so that a bird should not have to watch the devouring of its young, but I find it hard to believe that it is meant as a mitzvah to be done in ordinary circumstances if one is not in dire need of the eggs.

Amy Winehouse And Cremation

08/04/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | JEWISH WEEK ONLINE COLUMNIST | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - I have always been under the impression that cremation and tatoos are forbidden by Jewish law. Yet the recent funeral for Amy Winehouse was very Jewish in nature although the singer — who was amply tattooed — had asked to be cremated. Is cremation now accepted in Jewish quarters?

Free Speech for Inflammatory Rabbis?

07/28/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | JEWISH WEEK ONLINE COLUMNIST | Hammerman on Ethics

Q – The recent police detainment of prominent right wing Israeli rabbis accused of incitement has been in the news lately. At issue is the halachic tract “Torat Hamelech," (the “Torah of Kings”) which allegedly condones the murder of non Jews in some circumstances. This is horrible, but how is it different from any artist or politician making an outlandish statement? Certainly those on the left have said equally inflammatory things. Are we discriminating against the rabbis? Aren’t they entitled to freedom of speech?<

A Thousand Terrorists for Shalit?

07/21/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | JEWISH WEEK ONLINE COLUMNIST | Hammerman on Ethics

Q – Is the release of Gilad Shalit worth an exchange of a thousand Hamas prisoners, including some who have blood on their hands and could well kill more innocent Israelis (and others)?

Punching Your Ticket

07/08/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | JEWISH WEEK ONLINE COLUMNIST | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - I frequently use a 10-trip punch card on the LIRR. Often the conductor fails to appear to punch the card before I get off. What is my obligation here? Should I tear up the card before it runs out to make up the difference or am I free to use it again as it is the responsibility of the railroad to collect the fare? This does not involve deception since I am ready to pay the fare.

Gay Marriage: A Moral Choice?

06/30/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - I have some sympathy for gay marriage, just legalized in New York, but I can't understand how anyone who takes the Torah seriously could consider it the proper moral choice. I mean, the book of Leviticus is rather explicit in describing homosexuality as "an abomination." How can anyone get around that?

06/24/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - My daughter, a freshman on a large college campus, was invited to the home of a local rabbi for Friday night dinner. The rabbi is nontrivial affiliated with Hillel or any synagogue, but has gotten deeply involved in college life and invites groups of students to his home nearly every week. The kids seem to really enjoy it. Last weekend I found out one reason. The liquid refreshment flows freely, and I'm not just talking about Kiddush wine. On the one hand I'm glad my kid is doing something Jewish, but serving liquor to minors scares me.

Artificial Meat: Kosher or Not?

06/17/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - I recently heard reports about the creation of artificial meat, using with animal stem cells. To this point, it exists only in a Petri dish, but it's time to start asking the tough questions. As one who keeps kosher and who is a vegetarian, would this kind of meat would be kosher - and would that be true even for pork? And since no killing would be involved, could a vegetarian eat this meat with a clear conscience?

A- As they say at Citi Field, it’s time to “Meet the Meats.”

Jewish Ethics and Anthony Weiner's Very Bad Week

06/09/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - Does Rep. Weiner's admitted act of sending out explicit photos of himself disqualify him from public office? Is this a new form of adultery? Given the fact that "sexting" is so common these days among young people, will it become a political albatross comparable to pot smoking for aspiring pols who came of age in the '60s? After all, isn't this just a byproduct of the Internet revolution in the way that drug use was the byproduct of the counter culture?

Flooding a Town to Save Another

06/03/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q -In reading about the recent Mississippi River floods, it was shocking to see how spillways were opened in less populated areas, in effect deliberately flooding out thousands of homes in order to save more populated areas downstream. How can anyone justify wiping out entire communities like that? And conversely, is it right for people to deliberately move into areas that are known "spill zones," where flooding is known to occur.

Men Behaving Badly

05/27/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - In the wake of recent sex scandals involving Arnold Schwarzenegger and Dominique Strauss-Kahn, Time Magazine ran a cover story asking the rhetorical question, "What Makes Powerful Me Act Like Pigs?" Ethically speaking, how does Judaism account for this constant abuse of power by piggish men?

Tattoos And Solidarity With Survivors

05/20/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - I recall reading several years ago about a survivor's son who had engraved a tattoo on his arm to match the one borne by his father at Auschwitz. I understand that he meant it as a gesture of solidarity, but doesn't Jewish law prohibit tattoos?

Ethically, Is it Good to Die For Your Country?

05/13/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - Every Israeli schoolchild learns the famous quote of a dying hero Joseph Trumpledor, "it is good to die for one's country." The line has always troubled me. Ethically speaking, is it really good to die for your country?

Is it Right to Celebrate Bin-Laden's Death?

05/05/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - The killing of Osama bin-Laden sent Americans out into the streets in spontaneous celebration. I saw the raucous scene outside the White House and it made me uncomfortable. Isn't it against Jewish practice to rejoice at the downfall of your enemies?

Sparing the Rod?

04/22/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - I was shocked to read recently that corporal punishment is still legal in 20 states. I also know the famous quote from Proverbs, “Spare the rod, spoil the child.” But on Passover we are taught to answer a child’s questions with patience. Is it ever acceptable for a parent or teacher to hit a child?
A - It is never appropriate to hit a child, at school or at home. Period.

Breaking Passover: Worse Than Illicit Sex?

04/15/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q: A friend told me that in Jewish law, breaking Passover is considered as wrong as illicit sex. Can that possibly be true?

A: If you're insinuating that eating a bagel on Passover is akin to forcibly raping someone, exactly what planet do you live on?

Seder Guests and the Dysfunctional Family

04/07/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - "I heard from an observant friend that it is inappropriate to invite non Jews to a Seder; but doesn't it also say in the Haggadah, "Let those who are hungry come and eat?" So am I supposed to invite only Jewish homeless and hungry people? Plus, given my strained family dynamics, I think it would be best not to invite any guests at all. What's the ethical thing to do?

Is it Cruel to Force Dogs to Keep Passover?

03/31/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - I've heard that pets are supposed to keep Passover. I'm fairly traditional regarding Passover and just got a dog. Isn't it cruel to force an innocent animal to change its entire diet for a whole week? It's hard enough for humans!

A- As the proud owner of two adorable standard poodles, one of whom is extremely neurotic, I can sympathize with you.

If I'm an Ethical Person, Does That Make Me a Good Jew?

03/24/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - I have been struggling with some issues. I am not observant and the teacher of a class I've been taking has led me to believe that this makes me a bad Jew. I do lots of good deeds and am ethical in my actions. So can a good person be a bad Jew?

A - Relax. Loving your neighbor puts you are well on your way to being a "good Jew," whatever that means.

Is Drunkenness on Purim a No-No?

03/17/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - In an age where addiction is so widespread, is it ethical to promote drunkenness on Purim?

A. No it is not.

Live or Let Die?

03/06/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - I am the designated medical surrogate for an individual who has a living will specifying DNR/Do Not Resuscitate. The physicians and hospital have been informed and have copies of the living will and DNR. Our loved one took a downward turn but the medical team resuscitated him. The patient prospered from their efforts and returned to his pre-resuscitation health status. Should I report the medical team for ethical non-compliance of the DNR/living will orders?

Is Jeter a Cheater?

02/18/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - With baseball’s spring training underway, I’m reminded of an incident from last season. Derek Jeter, one of the few superstars from the past decade not implicated in baseball’s steroid sample, was caught on video pretending to be hit by a pitch.

Snow Days, Facebook and Cheating

02/03/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - I am a high school student. My math final was postponed because of a mid-day snow storm, but a friend of mine had taken the test earlier that day. That night while I was studying, I paused to take a peek at my Facebook news feed and saw that my friend had posted a page from the test. I didn't realize what it was at first so I looked at it. But when I realized what it was, I deleted it. I took the test the next day and did not say anything. I had studied hard and would have gotten those answers right anyway. Was I right to say nothing?

Gabrielle Giffords' Jewishness

01/13/2011 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - I am a traditional Jew who subscribes to the traditional definition of Jewish identity (you are Jewish if your mother is Jewish or if you've converted). By this definition, Gabrielle Giffords is not Jewish. But by other definitions, including her own, she is. Given all she has done and what she has gone through, and given the strong possibility that her assailant attacked her in part because of her self-declared Jewish identity, what is the proper ethical response to all this?

Michael Vick and Forgiveness

12/30/2010 | JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - Does Michael Vick deserve the accolades he is getting?

Photos at a Bris?

12/23/2010 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - My son's bris is in a couple of days and lots of family and friends will be attending. I'm OK with people taking pictures but I really don't want photos of my son all over the Internet. What can I do?

The Ethics of WikiLeaks

12/10/2010 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q. Was the leaking of a trove of private diplomatic communications ethical? And once leaked, is it ethical for news organizations to publish them?

Airport Screenings and Jewish Ethics

11/26/2010 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q. Has airport security crossed the line? Things were far less complicated back when only Superman had X-ray vision. As long as we stayed clear of the Daily Planet, we were in the clear. Now, with the new airport security measures, nothing is hidden anymore - not even our privates are private. Is this a good thing?

Is 'Don't Ask Don't Tell' Ethical?

11/15/2010 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - Is "Don't Ask Don't Tell" Ethical?

A. Since you're asking, I'll tell: "Don't Ask,, Don't Tell" is unethical.

Cliff Notes, Moby Dick - and Rashi

11/09/2010 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q: My teacher thinks I plagiarized an essay, but I didn’t. True, I looked at Cliff Notes about the assigned book, Moby Dick, but I also read much of it and only used the notes as a guide. So what’s wrong with that?

To Gift or Not To Gift, That is the Question

10/29/2010 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q. My daughter’s bat mitzvah will occur next December, and she is currently in 6th grade. Parents are encouraged to invite the entire Hebrew School class, but because the synagogue office has been giving out addresses by calendar year and not by grade, she is already getting a number of invitations from 7th graders whom she doesn’t know.

Robbing Peter to Pay Paul - At a Coffee Shop

10/20/2010 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - Last spring I lent $200 to a woman who works at a midtown coffee shop near my office. I've gone in there every day for years and have gotten friendly with her - in fact, I know her whole life story and we are on a first name basis. When I lent her the money to pay for an emergency medical procedure, she promised to pay me back, although I had my doubts that she would be able to.

I went away over the summer and when I came back to the coffee shop I decided not to mention the loan and see what would happen. But when I went to pay for my coffee she smiled and waved me by and said, "It's on the house." This has now happened for a couple of weeks and I suspect she is giving me the freebies to pay off the loan. The problem is, she doesn't own the shop. What do I do?

You Broke It, You Own It, Own Up to It

10/08/2010 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q. While visiting a friend, I almost tripped on an expensive piece of electronics that was not where it was supposed to be - in fact, it was on the floor, sticking out into the hallway, posing a hazard. When I hit it, I heard an ominous "crack." Obviously I did it some real damage, although it was not immediately visible.

My Big Fat Employee

09/21/2010 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q – An employee of mine has put on a lot of weight. He really looks horrible. We are a service related enterprise and appearance counts. Plus, I’m concerned about the added health risks that could be harmful to his job performance (as well as to his personal life). Do I have the right to warn or suspend him?

Getting More Than You Paid For

09/03/2010 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q. I just came from the store, having bought an mp3 player. When I opened it I noticed that they had given me a newer, enhanced model, not the one I had paid for. The store is about 25 miles away. To return it I would be spending as much on gas for the round trip as I would have spent had I purchased the newer model. What is the ethical thing to do?

File Sharing: Kosher or Not?

08/13/2010 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - Is it ethical to download and share current movies, songs and articles without paying for them?

It's hard to find a justification for the free use of video or music that people should be paying for. There's a reason they call it "piracy." But it all comes down to drawing the line between sharing and stealing.

Is it Ethical to Boycott BP?

08/03/2010 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q- Do you think it's right for people to boycott BP and get their gas elsewhere, as punishment for the oil spill?

There is definitely a "punish at the pumps" mentality afloat with regard to BP and the Deepwater Horizon oil spill, and I must admit, I haven't stopped at a BP since it happened. Gassing up at BP in this hostile climate would be like wearing a mink at PETA convention.

Hanky Panky on a Shul Board

07/16/2010 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q - I'm a shul president and I've just discovered that two of my board members have been carrying on an affair, using board meeting nights as cover for their trysts. I like them both and they are very hard workers. I like their spouses too. I'm not sure what to do. Do I confront them? Do I tell the rabbi? Do I kick them off the board?

Is It Ethical to Read My Husband's Email?

06/29/2010 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q. Is it ethical to read my husband’s email? I don't have reason to think he's cheating, but I' m the nervous type…

If you have no reason to suspect him, you would be putting far too much at risk by invading his privacy.  You in fact would be the one guilty of betraying trust.  Let it go.

Helen Thomas: Should We Forgive an Anti-Semite Who Apologizes?

06/10/2010 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q: The Helen Thomas case prompts a question: What she said on that video was horrible, but given the fact that she apologized and is so old, isn’t it in the spirit of Judaism to forgive her?

Is it OK to Hide a Fugitive From the Police?

06/07/2010 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q: You are out for a walk one night and you see a man running towards you. He looks terrified, stressed and panicked. He comes up to you with tears in his eyes and says, “I am going to hide right here. I can’t run anymore. I didn’t do anything wrong. Please, promise me you won’t tell them where I am!”

So you promise the man, he hides behind a bush and you keep walking.

No Handshake: Don't Take it Personally

06/01/2010 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q: Hey Rabbi-- I have a quick question. I met the Rabbi at the Chabad at our school. Anyways, I had a long conversation with him and when I went to leave I put out my hand to shake his hand and he politely declined. Does my hand have a disease? What's going on here?
Thanks and hope everything is well

A: No you don't have a disease!

The Ethics of Giving: Jewish vs. Non-Jewish?

05/18/2010 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q: My wife and I disagree about charitable giving. I believe most of our charitable dollars should go to helping our own Jewish people; she wants to give to local non-Jewish groups, like the homeless shelter and food bank. What's the magic formula about Jewish v. non-Jewish giving, according to Jewish law?

Should I be concerned about my kid's non-Jewish friend?

05/10/2010 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q. My daughter, 10, goes to a Jewish day school, but her best friend is a non-Jewish neighbor. Should I be concerned? What should I tell her?

A. There might be underlying reason for concern, though not specifically because her BFF isn’t an MOT (Member of the Tribe).

Animal Cruelty and Jewish Law

05/03/2010 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q: This may sound weird, but I think my neighbor is cruel to his pet beagle. I know that if this was a person we were talking about, Jewish law would obligate me to go to the authorities. But this is a DOG. What's my obligation here?

A. You need to pursue this. I say this not merely because I am life-long pet-o-phile, a vegetarian with two cuddly standard poodles. I say this also because it is the right thing to do. Jewish culture has long championed animal rights.

Coming Clean with a Fiancée

04/15/2010 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q: I'm about to get married to the woman of my dreams. She knows I was married before; what she doesn't know is that the marriage broke up because I was a schmuck. Ethically speaking, how much do I need to tell her?

You have a right to privacy, but a relationship that begins with massive deception has little chance of long term success.

Should I Keep An Undeserved Bonus?

04/09/2010 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Q. My boss has decided to give me a big bonus for something I only helped with; another worker deserves it more than I do. But I need the money, and she is pretty well off. What's the right thing to do?

A. Maybe your contribution was more integral to the success of the project than you realize. But, regardless, you should be forthcoming. Not only does our tradition demand honesty in how we conduct business, but it's really the most practical professional decision you can make.

Renting Dodger Stadium for a Bar Mitzvah

04/01/2010 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Question: My husband wants a lavish bar mitzvah for our son next year. I think it's wrong to spend $ 50,000 on a party for a 13 year old kid when so many of our fellow Jews are experiencing hard times. What does Jewish law have to say about this?

Should Mrs. Madoff have reported Bernie?

11/23/2009 | RABBI JOSHUA HAMMERMAN | SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH WEEK | Hammerman on Ethics

Question: Should Mrs. Madoff have reported Bernie? What does Jewish law say about her obligations?

Let's assume for the sake of argument that Ruth knew about the Ponzi scheme and that Bernie's crimes were committed while of sound mind and body. From the public record there is little information about Bernie's mental state - aside from indications he is a grade-A sociopath, of course.

So should Ruth have blown the whistle on Bernie? By all means.

Family loyalty cuts deep in Jewish tradition, but not that deep.

Responses for many of these scenarios:

Hammerman on Ethics Cases

The Ethics of WikiLeaks

Q. Was the leaking of a trove of private diplomatic communications ethical? And once leaked, is it ethical for news organizations to publish them?
A. It's rarely ethical to intercept private communications and make them public. But are official state communications ever really private? In the 11th century, Rabbenu Gershom issued a ban of excommunication to those who opened other people's mail. But he also stated that it was OK to open mail that had been discarded, i.e. placed into the public domain. After a certain time, most government material finds its way into those very same places, whether the trash bin or some presidential library. I can't wait to see the Wikileaks exhibit at the Obama Library someday - or maybe at the Julian Assange / Daniel Ellsberg/ Joe Wilson Whistle Blower Museum.
Once the quarter million cables were made available to the public, newspapers like the NY Times were on solid ethical ground in publishing those materials that do not put lives at risk or directly harm the national interest. But freedom of the press carries a moral cost. As quoted in the Wall Street Journal, Anthony E. Varona, professor and associate dean at American University-Washington College of Law, said the line is still unclear between "giving the public the news it has a First Amendment right to receive and serving as instruments of lawlessness."
Ethics is often situational, and in this case, while the cables have revealed nothing terribly startling, it has exposed the alarm felt within among Arab leaders regarding Iran, which should make it easier for Israel and America to pursue a harder line in responding to the threat. Weren't you just shocked, shocked to hear that Saudi King Abdullah urged the US to attack Iran and that the Chinese had hacked into Google? Assange has not upended the world order; he's simply removed the emperor's clothes.
I am troubled, however, that we've crossed a perilous line; there is no such thing as confidentiality anymore. Transparency in government is a good thing, but privacy and trust are also vital. We read in Proverbs (11:13) "A base fellow gives away secrets, but a trustworthy soul keeps a confidence." The Talmud (Yoma 4b) adds that even trivial details of casual communications should not be disclosed without permission. Jewish sources also indicate that in this case individual needs could be trumped by overriding communal concerns.
It seems that the State Department now needs to learn what the rest of us knew long ago. Every time you click and send, expect that message to eventually be out there for the entire world to see.
Rabbi Joshua Hammerman is spiritual leader of Temple Beth El in Stamford, CT. Read his blog here, and follow him on Twitter.

Is 'Don't Ask Don't Tell' Ethical?

Q - Is "Don't Ask Don't Tell" Ethical?

A. Since you're asking, I'll tell: "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" is unethical.
At the time it was instituted, President Clinton's "See No Evil" formula, based, somewhat surprisingly, on an article from an Orthodox Jewish publication, was a step forward in reducing discrimination, even if it did evoke memories of the immortal Sgt. Schultz.
But times have changed.
As ethicist John Marshall explains on his insightful blog, Ethics Alarms, "The law treats gay Americans in a biased and discriminatory manner, reinforcing negative stereotypes and the irrational fears. It also hurts the military and the nation by robbing it of able soldiers and military personnel."
Compounding the problem, a recent survey sent to military families to assess attitudes toward gays only reinforces those negative stereotypes, posing leading questions like, "If a wartime situation made it necessary for you to share bathroom facilities with an open bay shower with someone you believe to be a gay or lesbian service member, which are you most likely to do?"
Imagine a similar survey regarding whether a soldier would leave his wallet on the nightstand if the guy on the next cot were a Jew.
I'm all for keeping one's bedroom behavior private, especially in this age of TMI. But sexual orientation is less about bedroom behavior than identity formation, and the evidence clearly points to it not being a choice. That has become even more evident in the years since Clinton's policy was enacted.
An interesting Talmudic conversation centers on the Torah's injunction that conscientious objectors are exempt from fighting in a discretionary war (as opposed to a war of survival). Some rabbis expanded this include anyone burdened by sin. But since every person sins, this ruling, taken to its logical extreme, would exempt us all from fighting. What if they gave a war and nobody came? Now, I don't believe that homosexuality is a sin, but, by this logic, even those who do should be able to see how "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" has earned its dishonorable discharge. Why should a convicted felon be allowed to serve publicly, and not an "outed" homosexual?
Maybe it's time for the military to keep all forms of sexual expression out of the barracks. We can start with those demeaning pin up posters that objectify women. Of course war is all about objectifying the Other. That's understandable with regard to the enemy (though ethically questionable) - it is much easier to kill him that way. But why dehumanize our friends too? In Israel, the army is the great unifier, the place where social barriers come down, where women and men, Jew and non-Jew, Orthodox and secular, gay and straight, all serve together. In Israel, the gay issue is no big deal. And I can see why. Personally, if I'm going to be in the line of fire next to someone, confronting together our deepest fears, it would be terribly burdensome to live a lie. Life becomes transparent in a foxhole.

Snow Days, Facebook and Cheating

Q - I am a high school student. My math final was postponed because of a mid-day snow storm, but a friend of mine had taken the test earlier that day. That night while I was studying, I paused to take a peek at my Facebook news feed and saw that my friend had posted a page from the test. I didn't realize what it was at first so I looked at it. But when I realized what it was, I deleted it. I took the test the next day and did not say anything. I had studied hard and would have gotten those answers right anyway. Was I right to say nothing?

A - OK, let's set aside the question of right and wrong for a moment. Does your friend actually want to go to college? Does he want eventually to get a job? Does he realize how exposed he is right now? Assuming he sent the answers to all his Facebook friends, not just you, someone is bound to rat on him. And even if not, the evidence is out there in cyberspace, and that means it's there forever. Even if this teacher is clueless as to the ways of social networking, some other teacher or prospective employer or college admissions officer will find out about it.
What happened is similar to the recent cheating scandal at the University of Central Florida, where 600 business students were forced to retake an exam after the professor got wind that hundreds of them had gotten access to the answer key online. The professor's speech to the students has become a YouTube classic. The incident has sparked soul searching on that campus and well beyond, as people have speculated about a generational divide as to what constitutes cheating. It has simply become far too easy to cheat and few seem to care. But the technology that giveth also taketh away, and it is now much easier to detect cheating, which is what that UCF professor was able to do after a statistical analysis of the students' answers.
You didn't cheat actively, since you couldn't know that it was your exam until you were already looking at it. But you should have privately encouraged your friend to 'fess up and then, assuming he didn't, you should have informed the teacher that the test was compromised. If that page was seen by enough eyes, the scores may have been skewed, to the detriment of those whose only sin is that they are not addicted to Facebook.
Lawyers call it inadvertent disclosure when they gain access to material of value accidently sent by the other side. Legal ethicists often give the benefit of the doubt to passive recipients of such material, but Jewish law would be less charitable: you would be guilty of "G'neivat Da'at," the stealing of knowledge, and, as this essay explains, you would also be culpable of assisting a wrongdoer.
The next time someone shoots you online answers to a test, think of it as a computer virus. Open at your own risk.

Robbing Peter to Pay Paul - At a Coffee Shop

Q - Last spring I lent $200 to a woman who works at a midtown coffee shop near my office. I've gone in there every day for years and have gotten friendly with her - in fact, I know her whole life story and we are on a first name basis. When I lent her the money to pay for an emergency medical procedure, she promised to pay me back, although I had my doubts that she would be able to.
I went away over the summer and when I came back to the coffee shop I decided not to mention the loan and see what would happen. But when I went to pay for my coffee she smiled and waved me by and said, "It's on the house." This has now happened for a couple of weeks and I suspect she is giving me the freebies to pay off the loan. The problem is, she doesn't own the shop. What do I do?

A - Many eating establishments allow employees to grab a cup of coffee for themselves from time to time.
Even a behemoth like McDonalds allows a free drink and half-price meals to those behind the counter. If the coffee comes from her perk rather than her boss's pocket, everyone's a winner. She is reimbursing you, one cup at a time. If she is repaying you by stealing from her boss, however, not only is that a crime, but you are an accessory, and if it's discovered, she could lose her job. It's classic case of robbing Peter to pay Paul.
Rabbi Jacob Ben Asher, a medieval codifier also known as the Ba'al Ha-Turim, spoke of how important it is for the lender not to shame the borrower if he knows that a loan cannot be repaid. This is based on Exodus 22:24. You have every right to ask, gently, if it's really OK for her to be pouring complimentary cups. If you determine that it is, keep your own running tab and stop when it reaches $200, then let her know that the loan has been paid in full.
If, on the other hand, that steaming cup could land her in hot water, say "Thanks, but no thanks" and let her know that she doesn't need to be concerned about paying you back. I guarantee that your next cup will taste good to the last drop.
My Big Fat Employee

Q – An employee of mine has put on a lot of weight. He really looks horrible. We are a service related enterprise and appearance counts. Plus, I’m concerned about the added health risks that could be harmful to his job performance (as well as to his personal life). Do I have the right to warn or suspend him?

I’d tread carefully. Obesity is in the eye of the beholder, and besides, Leviticus 3:16 states that “all fat belongs to the Lord,” so either fattiness is next to Godliness or the Almighty’s been downing a few too many Hebrew Nationals.
he rabbis lived by their dictum, “Don’t look at the flask, but rather to that which is inside.” Tractate Brachot states, “The dignity of God’s creations is very great,” and Judaism emphasizes the need to give everyone proper respect. There is even a blessing to say (under your breath) when seeing a repulsive person: “Praised be God, for producing a variety of creations.”
One of the great 1st century sages, Rabbi Yehoshua, was known for his ability to turn repulsive looks to his advantage. Maybe your employee could do the same. If he has indeed allowed his life to get out of control, a concerned, friendly chat might be in order. But warnings and suspensions won’t be helpful – and you may end up in court.
This issue is fast becoming a prime legal concern in the workplace. Last spring a Hooters waitress in Michigan filed a weight discrimination lawsuit against her employers , and Lane Bryant protested not being able to show commercials for plus-sized clothing during American Idol and Dancing With the Stars. And earlier this year, Whole Foods was criticized for an incentive program trying to get workers to lose weight and get in shape.
As the culture becomes hyper-obsessed with appearance, those who don’t fit the cover-girl mold, meaning 90 percent of us, are at a disadvantage. Unless your business involves Chippendales or linebackers, it would seem that your ethical obligation would be not to discriminate against those who not only don’t fit the mold, but can’t fit into their jeans either. The nine tenths of us who have never appeared in centerfolds will appreciate it.

Hanky Panky on a Shul Board

Q - I'm a shul president and I've just discovered that two of my board members have been carrying on an affair, using board meeting nights as cover for their trysts. I like them both and they are very hard workers. I like their spouses too. I'm not sure what to do. Do I confront them? Do I tell the rabbi? Do I kick them off the board?

Confront them in private and if they fess up, hope that they have the good sense to resign from the board, effective immediately. Otherwise, once the news gets out, if you do nothing, the reputation of your board and, by extension, your congregation, will be in the toilet.
Yes, you might consider it hypocritical not to similarly punish board members who eat ham sandwiches or break the Sabbath. But ritual laws are between a person and God. Interpersonal laws are far more complicated, but something like this can rip apart the fabric of a community, and the ancient rabbis knew it.
The Torah states "And Israel abode in Shittim and the people began to commit harlotry" (Num. 25:1). Recognizing the damage that adultery can do to a community, the rabbis stated that the place was named "Shittim" because the people committed folly - "shtut," quoting Proverbs 6:32, "He who commits adultery is a complete idiot" (my translation).
If you fail to act, you'll be implicitly condoning their behavior, and your congregation will no longer be a safe zone for the aggrieved spouses and their legions of supporters, a number that will multiply daily as the gossip makes the rounds. You don't need to take sides, but if you ignore what occurred on your watch, that's exactly what you'll be doing, at the expense of the victims.
During my first year following ordination, way back in the last century, this exact same scenario unfolded. I was sopping wet behind the ears and an easy mark for a very powerful couple. The president passed the buck to me to decide their fate. So I called the perpetrators in. As their rabbi, I had to explain that they represent the organization and should resign from the board, but as their rabbi, I also let them know that I would treasure the chance to help them move forward toward repentance and reconciliation. They looked at me, a neophyte rabbi and virtual newlywed without a clue as to the trials of long-term marriage, like I was a little chutzpah-filled punk. I think the guy might have called me that. But I stood my ground, they left the board and the incident inspired me to write about the trials of being a young rabbi.

I heard from lots of people back then that when I reached my fifties, I'd come to understand why so many people sleep around, and then maybe I'd be less judgmental. Well, here I am, having successfully made it to midlife and I still don't get it. Oh I know that successful marriages aren't easy to sustain and I understand that temptation can be overpowering. I also try hard not to rush to judgment. But the act of deliberately jamming a dagger of betrayal into the heart of someone you once loved, or maybe someone you love still, that's something I've never been able to comprehend. Once a person has betrayed that most primal commitment, how can they be entrusted with the future of anything else?
Which is why I never vote for an unrepentant philanderer. And why I wouldn't want one on the board of my synagogue.
File Sharing: Kosher or Not?
Q - Is it ethical to download and share current movies, songs and articles without paying for them?

It's hard to find a justification for the free use of video or music that people should be paying for. There's a reason they call it "piracy." But it all comes down to drawing the line between sharing and stealing.
Online, that line has become increasingly hard to draw. The internet culture proclaims freedom throughout the cybersphere, unto all the media outlets thereof. Like the classic game of "whack-a-mole," for every Napster that was shut down, dozens of other free streaming sites have emerged. I've even found sites featuring free downloads of lectures dealing with the ethics of free downloads!
As one ethics site explains, photocopying a copyrighted article for personal, non-commercial or educational purposes is considered "fair use" and is legal. That covers much of what I share in classes and at services. Online, where sharing is de rigeur, wouldn't the sharing of nearly any material fall under the same category of "fair use?"
Before Al Gore invented the internet, I used to lend friends cassette tapes and no one arrested me. So why can't I do the same thing via e-mail? I'm not selling the material. And as one bar mitzvah student put it to me a few years ago, after having downloaded 800 songs on the old Napster, "Being part of a sharing community makes me feel like I'm living out the commandment, 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'"
Further, wouldn't this sharing only help the artist, by getting his name out there and creating buzz? The more downloads, the more he stands to cash in, eventually.
And what if I've already bought the song in several formats (LP, cassette, CD), thus giving the musician his royalties several times over - for the same song! I've paid for the music already, so what's the big deal about downloading an mp3 to play it on my iPod? Same goes for movies that I've already purchased in VHS and/or DVD format, or (heaven forbid) Betamax. The distributors are making a bundle on repackaging old stuff. Regarding the economic impact of file sharing and piracy, the only thing clear is that nothing is clear.
But shouldn't "Thou Shalt Not Steal" trump all other concerns? We do have to consider the artist's right to gain income from her intellectual property. And even though it's hard to like some of those others who stand to profit, the mogols, the agents, the huge companies, we have to think of their rights too.
What's considered improper from the perspective of Jewish law is not giving credit to the originator of an idea. The Talmud states (Megilla 15a) "One who quotes a statement in the name of its originator brings redemption to the world."
Improper, yes - but not necessarily illegal.
Beyond that, the jury is out. Freedom reigns, no matter how much the mogols try to rein it in. As for me, I prefer to download legally and above board, appreciating the convenience and low-cost of iTunes.
Rabbi Joshua Hammerman is spiritual leader of Temple Beth El in Stamford, CT. Read his blog here, and follow him on Twitter. Have an ethical dilemma? Email Rabbi Hammerman at HammermanOnEthics@gmail.com

Is It Ethical to Read My Husband's Email?
Q. Is it ethical to read my husband’s email? I don't have reason to think he's cheating, but I' m the nervous type…

If you have no reason to suspect him, you would be putting far too much at risk by invading his privacy. You in fact would be the one guilty of betraying trust. Let it go.

In the 11th century, Rabbenu Gershom issued a ban of excommunication to those who opened other people’s mail. He also banned polygamy. So we can assume that until then, Jewish spouses did lots of opening each other’s mail and, as a result, they acquired lots more spouses. When Gershom said “enough is enough,” perhaps he saw the connection between invasions of privacy and the fragility of monogamy.
But while opening someone else’s snail mail is a clear breach of trust, e-mail is more complicated. One would assume that in all cases it would be forbidden to open an e-mail addressed to another. In the growing field of digital etiquette, the question of email and privacy is a big one. Unlike regular mail, email is by its nature not private. That e-missive you send traverses many networks before it reaches the recipient. Copies of the email remain on servers and hard drives. Employers routinely monitor staff e-mails. The rule of thumb is to assume that anything you write, once you send it anywhere online, could be seen by the entire world.

Email is as private as a postcard. When I was a camp counselor, I routinely read the postcards
written by the kids in my bunk, just to make sure no one was sending home tear-stained sob stories about the camp food (or me). I don’t know if Gershom ever sent postcards from camp back then, or whether he would have included them in his ban. All I know is that my very ethical camp directors instructed me to read the kids’ postcards.
But even though email is not technically (or technologically) private, unlike a postcard it does have to be “opened,” so I suspect Rabbenu Gershom would still say it’s a no-no to read other people’s email.
You really have two compelling reasons not to open your spouse’s email: 1) he’s given you no reason not to trust him and 2) even if he were cheating, he’d be an absolute idiot to leave an email trail.
OK, so let’s assume that he’s an absolute idiot. If he’s that reckless, you’ll certainly find other clues to an affair in places that are not so private, like credit card bills and phone records; or in that lipstick on his collar.

Helen Thomas: Should We Forgive an Anti-Semite Who Apologizes?
Q: The Helen Thomas case prompts a question: What she said on that video was horrible, but given the fact that she apologized and is so old, isn’t it in the spirit of Judaism to forgive her?
A. Helen Thomas never apologized. On June 4, she placed the following statement on her website: “I deeply regret my comments I made last week regarding the Israelis and the Palestinians. They do not reflect my heart-felt belief that peace will come to the Middle East only when all parties recognize the need for mutual respect and tolerance. May that day come soon.”
There’s no mention of the “go back to Germany and Poland” part of her diatribe, nor do we find the word “apology” at all. A regret is not an apology. To feel badly about a painful result is not the same as taking responsibility for having inflicted the pain. Richard Blumenthal’s recent admission of “mis-speaking” (read: lying) regarding his military service and Vietnam was something he regretted at first, but only a week later did he apologize. Thomas’ statements, of course, were far worse, and her apology has yet to appear.
She needed to resign, and the “grumpy ol’geezer” defense won’t cut it. Her comments were shocking and offensive for a person of any age, much like those of Reverend Jeremiah Wright that caused candidate Obama to compare him to an old uncle. Both Thomas and Wright are embarrassments to embattled professions that pride themselves in judicious use of language – and they are an embarrassment to elderly people as well. I must admit that part of me feels uncomfortable about the instant trial that Helen Thomas received.
"Gotcha" journalism has now become so pronounced in the blogosphere and it reeks of what Jewish law calls rechilut, tale-bearing, one of the worst forms of gossip. Maybe, given her lifetime of service (apparently unblemished by prior smoking-gun anti-Semitism despite her vocal opposition to Israel), Thomas could have been better served had these remarks been shared with her and her employers privately at first, rather than creating an instant online firestorm. Private rebuke is a tack also supported by Jewish sources. If that approach didn’t result in her immediate resignation, that would have been the time to let the video go viral and let the court of public opinion decide.
I know and respect the rabbi who exposed Thomas on his blog. I can only imagine how shocked and pained he was to hear these now infamous Helen-isms, and I've no doubt that I would have responded similarly. So I'm not calling him out on this. (Otherwise, I should have done that privately too!) I'm just hoping we all can step back and not feel so smug that we "nabbed one." Anti-Semites won't disappear if we take them out, one at a time. Rabbi Nesenoff has seen first-hand how this viral, vile video has only stoked a hornets’ nest of Jew hatred, much of it directed at him personally. I'm also not convinced that Thomas was always a Jew hater even if what she said was clearly anti-Semitic.
There are times when Jew hatred needs to be exposed and confronted with an overwhelming response, like when a madman running a huge country calls for Israel’s destruction and denies the Holocaust. I’m not so sure Helen Thomas posed such a danger to society.
Which brings us back to the original question. Helen Thomas aside, should we forgive an anti-Semite who apologizes, or, to be precise, someone who makes an anti-Semitic remark, takes ownership of it, is remorseful and asks forgiveness?
Yes, we should. Our sages suggested that the greatest hero is the one who can transform an enemy into a friend. The Torah unambiguously discourages us from holding grudges. So, Helen, when you wake up one night in a cold sweat, finally sensing the full horror of what you said, give me a call. We’ll talk.

Is it Ethical to Boycott BP?
Q- Do you think it's right for people to boycott BP and get their gas elsewhere, as punishment for the oil spill?

There is definitely a "punish at the pumps" mentality afloat with regard to BP and the Deepwater Horizon oil spill, and I must admit, I haven't stopped at a BP since it happened. Gassing up at BP in this hostile climate would be like wearing a mink at PETA convention.
We all have the freedom to boycott companies that displease us. But as negligent as BP has been in this case, I agree with those who state that boycotting BP is both futile and unethical. To put it more cynically, as Newsweek did, "Boycott BP! Because it's much better to give your money to Exxon."
What you need to understand is that BP stations are independently owned, so by boycotting you would only be hurting the local little guy, not the bigwigs back in London (or, for that matter, the poor, elderly British pensioners whose life savings are tied to the company's fate).

Have you noticed how, as soon as the Gulf of Mexico sprung a leak, people stopped talking about Toyotas? A few months ago, Toyota was on the skids as their corporate woes accelerated. Now the car company is reporting a global sales surge that seems to have coincided with BP taking over the front pages. With the public's attention span so short and our zest for scapegoats so great, we'll undoubtedly move on to another villain as soon as the Gulf leak is plugged.
Some boycotts are OK, others aren't. Look at Ethical Consumer.org's complete list of current boycotts and you'll see a lot of familiar names.
Israel, of course, is a prime victim of this boycott mania. Israeli financier Shai Baaton has proposed a Jewish boycott of companies continuing to deal with Iran, a movement that is gaining some traction. This boycott has ethical grounding, but the blog "Ethics Alarms" questions all boycotts, calling the current BP shunning "close to the worst variety, blunt and destructive mob anger akin to the reaction of the excitable citizens of Homer Simpson's Springfield, whose solution to every crisis seems to be a riot."
Traditionally, a Jewish boycott begins when a rabbi declares something unkosher. Rabbinical certification is now addressing ethical concerns in food production, in the wake of the Rubashkin fiasco. So now, with Kosher Conscience, Ethical Kosher, the Conservative Magen Tzedek and the Orthodox Rabbinical Council of America's new ethical guidelines, the food industry will soon have its own BP's and Toyotas, and we'll have rabbinical permission to shun them.
Rabbinic boycotts extend well beyond food production. The Hebrew word for boycott is based on the term for excommunication, cherem. It is a religious category, the nuclear weapon in a rabbi's arsenal, and one that has been all too often abused.
So while boycotts for us are as common as "two Jews, three synagogues," in the case of BP it would be best to channel your Gulf-related anger into more constructive responses.

You Broke It, You Own It, Own Up to It

Q. While visiting a friend, I almost tripped on an expensive piece of electronics that was not where it was supposed to be - in fact, it was on the floor, sticking out into the hallway, posing a hazard. When I hit it, I heard an ominous "crack." Obviously I did it some real damage, although it was not immediately visible.
Should I have told my friend? Excuse: if I told on myself, I would have been duty bound to pay for the damage I caused - but since the damage was, in fact, due to his negligence in leaving it in an exposed place, I don't feel I should have to pay. But I also feel bad, skulking off like a thief. What's a Jew to do?

A: You break it, you own it. That principle applies whether you’re talking about a friend’s stereo, your landlord’s washing machine, your local china shop (to which you bring your pet bull) or the Gulf of Mexico.
Most retailers will give the customer a break, writing off the broken item as a business loss. Maybe your friend will do the same, especially in light of where the item was placed.
Still, if we were talking about, say, your friend’s dachshund that had been lying on the floor, you would not be squawking about his negligence right now.
If you had tapped his car while parking and heard an ominous crack, would you have left a phone number or simply scooted off?
There are certain situations where the fault may not be yours, like, say, if you are vision-impaired or a two year old child. Also, if the room is dark and cluttered with your friend’s stuff, the Shulchan Aruchsays you are not liable (Choshen Mishpat 411-12). Then your friend would have been obligated to get rid of the obstacle course in his living room. Deuteronomy 22 speaks of a homeowner’s need to build a parapet on the roof in order to safeguard guests from harm. That’s the deal that we strike when we visit a friend’s house. He promises a safe environment – and you promise not to trash the place.
But if you can see it, and then you break it, you own it.
So own up to it.

Should I Keep An Undeserved Bonus?

Q. My boss has decided to give me a big bonus for something I only helped with; another worker deserves it more than I do. But I need the money, and she is pretty well off. What's the right thing to do?

A. Maybe your contribution was more integral to the success of the project than you realize. But, regardless, you should be forthcoming. Not only does our tradition demand honesty in how we conduct business, but it's really the most practical professional decision you can make.
You still may get the monetary bonus, plus the additional benefits of a grateful co-worker and big-time brownie points from a boss who’ll admire your integrity and humility.

But were you to accept the payment without comment, every time you pass your colleague at the water cooler you'd wonder if she’s on to you... and has she told the boss?
From this "harmless" little episode - not even an outright lie - could cascade a Had Gadya effect of unintended consequences leading to your ultimate dismissal.
On the other hand, as we play this out, your co-worker could save you at the last minute because she always had a mad crush on you, then you marry and have a kid who makes a bundle in the stock market, buys out your boss and then throws it all away to become a rabbi.... But I digress).
The letters comprising the term for truth, Emet, are the first, last and middle letters of the Hebrew alphabet. Those who embrace the truth can confidently reach out in all directions and build successful working relationships. In contrast, the letters for the word for “lie,” sheker, are huddled together in a corner at the end of the alphabet, looking much like you would look if you played out this ruse, a guilt-burdened employee cowering in a corner behind his desk.
Emet, is repeated seven times, almost mantra-like, in the morning liturgy, just after the Sh'ma. In the evening version of that same prayer, Emet is joined by Emunah: trust. Our prayers are telling us that trust and truth go hand in hand.
But anyone who’s ever worked in an office already knows that.

Renting Dodger Stadium for a Bar Mitzvah
Question: My husband wants a lavish bar mitzvah for our son next year. I think it's wrong to spend $ 50,000 on a party for a 13 year old kid when so many of our fellow Jews are experiencing hard times. What does Jewish law have to say about this?
Answer: You're right, sort of. And your husband is all wrong. Did you know that $50,000 can feed 10,000 malnourished African children for a week? I think I once saw that on a UNICEF box. Yes, Jewish law frowns on spending excessively and consuming conspicuously; but it's not simply a matter of sensitivity to those enduring hard times.
Back in the 16th century, the Shulchan Aruch law code called it a religious obligation for a father to a honor of his son's bar mitzvah with a festive meal (a "seudat mitzvah"). But I don't think they considered the possibility of renting out Dodger Stadium or the QE 2.
Even back then, Solomon Luria, in a commentary on the Talmudic tractate Baba Kama, bemoaned that Bar Mitzvah celebrations had become "occasions for wild levity, just for the purpose of stuffing the gullet." There is no mention of whether Luria was also annoyed at those endless candle lighting ceremonies or the mind-numbing games of games of "Coke and Pepsi."
Abraham was the first to host a "seudat mitzvah" in the Torah, preparing a grand banquet when Isaac was weaned. It is not known how much Abraham spent on the festivities, though he was famous for cutting no corners when entertaining guests, so at the very least we can presume that there was no cash bar.
Although one commentary suggests that Isaac was 13, it's hard to imagine that even the Torah's greatest mama's boy took that long to be weaned. Abe's other son Ishmael, however, was 13 at the time of his bris. Considering that Abraham also circumcised himself at the time, and he was 99, one could guess that the shindig was kept low-key.
The classic contemporary example of Bar Mitzvah-related excess was the infamous 1998 Titanic Bat Mitzvah in Pittsburgh, complete with phosphorescent artificial icebergs, 12-foot steaming smokestacks at the buffet table and a huge photo of the young lady's face superimposed over Kate Winslet's body, in Leonardo DiCaprio's loving embrace. The dress alone reportedly cost $27,000. This Titanic disaster led many to wonder whether we were going overboard on these celebrations.
Frustration regarding over-the-top parties cuts across denominational lines, as excessive waste is considered to violate the Jewish principles of "Bal Tashchit," based on passage from Deuteronomy prohibiting cutting down trees during wartime. Judaism always emphasizes simplicity and modesty. It was around the time of the Pittsburgh party that Rabbi Jeffrey Salkin's book, Putting God on the Guest List: How to Reclaim the Spiritual Meaning of Your Child's Bar or Bat Mitzvah," began to make its way onto family reading lists in Hebrew Schools across the land.
But your question does not presuppose that conspicuous consumption is wrong - just that it's tacky to do it during hard times. So are you presuming that $50,000 would make more sense if half the guest list hadn't lost their fortunes with Smilin' Bernie? Or are you just concerned that these nouveau poor will assume that you are spending a fortune simply to make them stew in their misfortune? Is this a matter of waste - or simply bad taste?
Tell your husband that such extravagance is wrong even when times are right. But I also know that a scaled back Bar Mitzvah can still be pricy.
It's easy to blame the caterers for the outrageous costs. And I understand that you've got to do something for Aunt Millie, before her hernia acts up, and Uncle Harold's no spring chicken either. I know that families are scattered more than ever and that this is often the only time when they can come together, since, with people getting married later, you can no longer count on everyone making it to the wedding. I know that costs add up and yes, there are social pressures to keep up with the Steins. But the recession gives us a chance, at long last, to pull back from this edge.
Why not take some of that money and apply it to a family trip to Israel? How about cutting back on the accessories and double the amount your son contributes to his mitzvah project.
He does have a mitzvah project, doesn't he?
At the very least, save some for college. Believe me, you'll need it!

Animal Cruelty and Jewish Law
Q: This may sound weird, but I think my neighbor is cruel to his pet beagle. I know that if this was a person we were talking about, Jewish law would obligate me to go to the authorities. But this is a DOG. What's my obligation here?

A. You need to pursue this. I say this not merely because I am life-long pet-o-phile, a vegetarian with two cuddly standard poodles. I say this also because it is the right thing to do. Jewish culture has long championed animal rights.
The Torah could not be more explicit when it instructs us (Exodus 23:5) to assist the animal of your enemy.
In that verse, the animal is a donkey that has been mistreated, presumably by its owner. Based on this law, the rabbis established the concept of "tza'ar ba'ale hayyim," calling on us to minimize the suffering of all living creatures, literally to "feel their pain" in a Bill Clinton sort of way.
Jews have a long history of opposing such activities as hunting for sport or cockfighting. The Talmud goes as far as to state that even the person who sits in the stadium to watch this kind of event spills blood. We should refrain from eating until we've fed our animals and we are not permitted to buy cattle beasts or birds unless we can adequately care for them.
Animals even get to observe Shabbat, during which we are prohibited from placing any burden at all on them. A full chapter of the Shulchan Aruch deals with this. A nice summary of the Jewish view on animal rights can be found here.
The ASPCA web site details how to determine if abuse is really taking place and what you need to do about it. The Michael Vick case has sensitized us all to the need for vigilance against animal abuse, and the first line of defense is the neighbors. The Humane Society of the United States even has a dog fighting tip line - although it likely won't be relevant with a pet beagle. American Jews have had an animal rights scandal all our own, the inhumane conditions discovered at the now-bankrupt Agriprocessors plant.
Western society has come a long way in its sensitivity toward animals (in Elizabethan England, for instance, bloody dog fights were ubiquitous), but we've a long way to go.
So if your suspicions are well grounded, you've got to do something.

The Ethics of Giving: Jewish vs. Non-Jewish?
Q: My wife and I disagree about charitable giving. I believe most of our charitable dollars should go to helping our own Jewish people; she wants to give to local non-Jewish groups, like the homeless shelter and food bank. What's the magic formula about Jewish v. non-Jewish giving, according to Jewish law?

A. Nothing magical, but the Talmud actually does give us a formula for prioritizing our giving. It’s in Bava Metzia, page 71a, where Rabbi Joseph states that, in lending money, Jews take precedence over non-Jews, the poor over the rich, your relatives over the general poor of the town, and the local poor over the poor of another town.
That’s all fine and good, but what happens when we live in a more assimilated society, one where the lines separating Jew from non-Jew have blurred considerably?
If one gives significant sums to cancer research, who’s to say that donation won’t help Jews? Of course it will. So will the food bank, the homeless shelter, and, even indirectly the donation to earthquake victims in Haiti (look at how Israel’s humanitarian image was enhanced). Rabbi Josh Feigelson adds that technology has also made this a much smaller and more interconnected world. The Talmud (Gittin 61a) also makes it clear that, for the sake of peace, we are bound to provide for both the Jewish and non-Jewish poor and infirmed.
So what’s needed is a new formula, one that takes into account traditional Jewish values and dramatically shrinking world.
Here are some guidelines that might help:
• Since family comes first, give first to those causes that have the greatest impact on your family. If a loved one has Alzheimers, give to something like the Alzheimer’s Association. The fact that both Jews and non Jews will be helped is an added bonus.
• If there is a Jewish angle to a general cause, consider it. If your thing is a universal cause like environmentalism, you can give to groups that promote those values prom a Jewish perspective, like COEJL or Hazon.
• Give to local homeless shelters and food banks, but give also to organizations that support the homeless and hungry in Israel, like Yad Eliezer, and to those like Mazon, that help to feed Jews and non Jews everywhere, including possibly in your hometown.
In this shrunken world, all philanthropy, like politics, is local. We feel the pain of those suffering half a world away; and as we’ve seen with the gyrations of the stock market following the riots in Greece and the international havoc created by the ash cloud in Iceland, there is no escaping that interdependence.
So the magic formula isn’t so much about where you give, but that you give. Wherever you contribute, the donation will, in the end, help you. As the Talmud states, “When someone gives even the smallest amount (a prutah) s/he is privileged to sense God's presence.”

Is Jeter a Cheater?
Q - With baseball’s spring training underway, I’m reminded of an incident from last season. Derek Jeter, one of the few superstars from the past decade not implicated in baseball’s steroid sample, was caught on video pretending to be hit by a pitch. He was awarded first base although the ball clearly hit his bat. Is Jeter a cheater?

A - Yes he is – or at least was in that case. It was a big game too, which the Yankees eventually lost to TampaBay. He fessed up later on, but added, "It's part of the game. My job is to get on base." OK, that’s bad. But what’s worse is that the opposing manager, Joe Maddon, agreed that cheating is part of the game. "If our guys had did it,” he said, “I would have applauded that. It's a great performance on his part."
What’s wrong with this picture? Full disclosure: I’m a Boston fan, but I know that my teams have also prospered from the framed strike or phantom tag in baseball, the defender’s flop in basketball and the phony pass interference call in football. Speaking of football, my Patriots and the Jets seem to always be one-upping each other when it comes to spying and bending the rules.
So the question is not so much whether cheating is accepted – it is – but at what point does bending the rules turn into breaking the rules? At what point is the integrity of the game compromised? But the more important question is: How does this culture of cheating impact the kids who look to these athletes as role models – and what are the implications for society when these kids grow up?
The integrity of the baseball suffered greatly during the steroids era because those who played by the rules were punished for it. Stats were skewed and the playing field unleveled. But Jeter’s seemingly innocent acting job, while having little impact on the game, has a corrosive impact on society that is cumulative and dangerous. The more that cheating is accepted on the field, the more it will be seen as acceptable off it. As tractate Avot states, “Avera Goreret Avera,” “one transgression leads to another.”
Cheating in baseball is not new. Gaylord Perry rode his doctored pitches all the way to Cooperstown. The 1951 New York Giants’ stolen pitching signs fueled the “Shot heard round the world.” But maybe it all seemed more innocent back then, in those halcyon days before Madoff met the Mets. Now, cheating is dead serious and an enormous challenge for our culture (see my current column on the topic, “We Still Haven’t Put Bernie Away.” )
Fortunately, in the sheltered world of sports, there is a remedy: instant replay. If TampaBay had been allowed to challenge the call, Jeter would have looked even more the fool, and all faking would soon stop. The Yankee shortstop might have hit the next pitch for a homer – he is Derek Jeter, after all – but on some level we would have been able to say, “Jeters never prosper.”

Should Michael Vick Be Forgiven?
Q - Does Michael Vick deserve the accolades he is getting? Or does he deserve to die, as Tucker Carlson said last week on Fox News in response to President Obama's congratulating the Philadelphia Eagles for giving Vick a second chance? Carlson said: "I'm a Christian, I've made mistakes myself, I believe fervently in second chances. But Michael Vick killed dogs, and he did in a heartless and cruel way. And I think, personally, he should've been executed for that. He wasn't, but the idea that the President of the United States would be getting behind someone who murdered dogs? Kind of beyond the pale."
Is it ethical to forgive Vick so soon?
A - Really, Tucker! Is it ethical to listen to Fox News when they allow someone to incite a lynch mob simply as means of taking yet another cheap shot at the President? Even when he is doing the most Christian thing imaginable, forgiving a repentant sinner, Obama can't buy a break from the Foxxies.
But the question here is not whether the President deserves a break, but does Vick - or, more precisely, does any ex prisoner? To that the answer is a resounding yes. Successful re-entry of those who have served their time is a major concern in our society. Nearly 650,000 prisoners are released from state and federal prisons each year, the vast majority of whom face legal and social obstacles that go far beyond the notion of punishment fitting the crime.
As for Vick, ESPN's Rick Reilly says it's time to forgive, that Vick has paid his debt. Torturing animals flies against everything Judaism believes in - hence the laws of Kashrut, which inculcate kindness to animals and sensitivity to all life. As a vegetarian and dog owner, I take those laws even further in my own personal practice, and every fiber of my body abhors what Vick did. But Jewish law mandates that the death penalty is meant to be utilized only in the case of the murder of a human being, and even then only in extraordinary circumstances.
Vick deserves a chance to play again, and he's making the most of it. I would not rush to anoint him Mr. Role Model, though, as many have. Americans love a comeback story, but don't confuse Vick with Michael Oher, a real hero, who was last year's NFL comeback cover boy. Last week, Vick said he would vote for himself for MVP, a disturbing sign that he may not have learned much about humility in prison. But fortunately he played himself out of the running against the Vikings, and Tom Brady, who does not profess to care about individual honors, will win it going away.
For Vick, the biggest prize is yet to be won, and I'm not talking about the Super Bowl. It's the prize of being able to go to bed peacefully every night, feeling fully content at having done more good than Ill for the world. For as long as those 47 rescued pit bulls are still alive, shaking, cowering and unable to bark, those peaceful nights should remain as elusive as ever.

Hammerman on Ethics Cases

Q- Do you think it’s right for people to boycott BP and get their gas elsewhere, as punishment for the oil spill?
There is definitely a “punish at the pumps” mentality afloat with regard to BP and the Deepwater Horizon oil spill, and I must admit, I haven’t stopped at a BP since it happened. Gassing up at BP in this hostile climate would be like wearing a mink at PETA convention.
We all have the freedom to boycott companies that displease us. But as negligent as BP has been in this case, I agree with those who state that boycotting BP is both futile and unethical. To put it more cynically, as Newsweek did, “Boycott BP! Because it’s much better to give your money to Exxon.”
What you need to understand is that BP stations are independently owned, so by boycotting you would only be hurting the local little guy, not the bigwigs back in London (or, for that matter, the poor, elderly British pensioners whose life savings are tied to the company’s fate).
Have you noticed how, as soon as the Gulf of Mexico sprung a leak, people stopped talking about Toyotas? A few months ago, Toyota was on the skids as their corporate woes accelerated. Now the car company is reporting a global sales surge that seems to have coincided with BP taking over the front pages. With the public’s attention span so short and our zest for scapegoats so great, we’ll undoubtedly move on to another villain as soon as the Gulf leak is plugged.
Some boycotts are OK, others aren’t. Look at Ethical Consumer.org’s complete list of current boycotts and you’ll see a lot of familiar names. Israel, of course, is a prime victim of this boycott mania. Israeli financier Shai Baaton has proposed a Jewish boycott‎ of companies continuing to deal with Iran, a movement that is gaining some traction. This boycott has ethical grounding, but the blog “Ethics Alarms” questions all boycotts, calling the current BP shunning “close to the worst variety, blunt and destructive mob anger akin to the reaction of the excitable citizens of Homer Simpson’s Springfield, whose solution to every crisis seems to be a riot.”
Traditionally, a Jews boycott begins when a rabbi declares something unkosher. Rabbinical certification is now addressing ethical concerns in food production, in the wake of the Rubashkin fiasco. So now, with Kosher Conscience, Ethical Kosher, the Conservative Magen Tzedek and the Orthodox Rabbinical Council of America’s new ethical guidelines, the food industry will soon have its own BP’s and Toyotas, and we’ll have rabbinical permission to shun them.
Rabbinic boycotts extend well beyond food production. The Hebrew word for boycott is based on the term for excommunication, cherem. It is a religious category, the nuclear weapon in a rabbi’s arsenal, and one that has been all too often abused.
So while boycotts for us are as common as “two Jews, three synagogues,” in the case of BP it would be best to channel your Gulf-related anger into more constructive responses.

Q – I’m a shul president and I’ve just discovered that two of my board members have been carrying on an affair, using board meeting nights as cover for their trysts. I like them both and they are very hard workers. I like their spouses too. I’m not sure what to do. Do I confront them? Do I tell the rabbi? Do I kick them off the board?
A – Confront them in private and if they fess up, hope that they have the good sense to resign from the board, effective immediately. Otherwise, once the news gets out, if you do nothing, the reputation of your board and, by extension, your congregation, will be in the toilet.
Yes, you might consider it hypocritical not to similarly punish board members who eat ham sandwiches or break the Sabbath. But ritual laws are between a person and God. Interpersonal laws are far more complicated, but something like this can rip apart the fabric of a community, and the ancient rabbis knew it.
The Torah states “And Israel abode in Shittim and the people began to commit harlotry" (Num. 25:1). Recognizing the damage that adultery can do to a community, the rabbis stated that the place was named "Shittim" because the people committed folly - "shtut," quoting Proverbs 6:32, "He who commits adultery is a complete idiot” (my translation).
If you fail to act, you’ll be implicitly condoning their behavior, and your congregation will no longer be a safe zone for the aggrieved spouses and their legions of supporters, a number that will multiply daily as the gossip makes the rounds. You don’t need to take sides, but if you ignore what occurred on your watch, that’s exactly what you’ll be doing, at the expense of the victims.
During my first year following ordination, way back in the last century, this exact same scenario unfolded. I was sopping wet behind the ears and an easy mark for a very powerful couple. The president passed the buck to me to decide their fate. So I called the perpetrators in. As their rabbi, I had to explain that they represent the organization and should resign from the board, but as their rabbi, I also let them know that I would treasure the chance to help them move forward toward repentance and reconciliation. They looked at me, a neophyte rabbi and virtual newlywed without a clue as to the trials of long-term marriage, like I was a little chutzpah-filled punk. I think the guy might have called me that. But I stood my ground, they left the board and the incident inspired me to write about the trials of being a young rabbi.
I heard from lots of people back then that when I reached my fifties, I’d come to understand why so many people sleep around, and then maybe I’d be less judgmental. Well, here I am, having successfully made it to midlife and I still don’t get it. Oh I know that successful marriages aren’t easy to sustain and I understand that temptation can be overpowering. I also try hard not to rush to judgment. But the act of deliberately jamming a dagger of betrayal into the heart of someone you once loved, or maybe someone you love still, that’s something I’ve never been able to comprehend. Once a person has betrayed that most primal commitment, how can they be entrusted with the future of anything else?
Which is why I never vote for an unrepentant philanderer. And why I wouldn’t want one on the bopard of my synagogue.
‎ Q - Is it ethical to download and share current movies, songs and articles without paying for them?
It’s hard to find a justification for the free use of video or music that people should be paying for. There’s a reason they call it “piracy.” But it all comes down to drawing the line between sharing and stealing.
Online, that line has become increasingly hard to draw. The internet culture proclaims freedom throughout the cybersphere, unto all the media outlets thereof. Like the classic game of “whack-a-mole,” for every Napster that was shut down, dozens of other free streaming sites have emerged. I’ve even found sites featuring free downloads of lectures dealing with the ethics of free downloads!
As one ethics site explains, photocopying a copyrighted article for personal, non commercial or educational purposes is considered “fair use” and is legal. That covers much of what I share in classes and at services. Online, where sharing is de rigeur, wouldn’t the sharing of nearly any material fall under the same category of “fair use?”
Before Al Gore invented the internet, I used to lend friends cassette tapes and no one arrested me. So why can’t I do the same thing via e-mail? I’m not selling the material. And as one bar mitzvah student put it to me a few years ago, after having downloaded 800 songs on the old Napster, “Being part of a sharing community makes me feel like I’m living out the commandment, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’”
Further, wouldn’t this sharing only help the artist, by getting his name out there and creating buzz? The more downloads, the more he stands to cash in, eventually.
And what if I’ve already bought the song in several formats (LP, cassette, CD), thus giving the musician his royalties several times over – for the same song! I’ve paid for the music already, so what’s the big deal about downloading an mp3 to play it on my iPod? Same goes for movies that I’ve already purchased in VHS and/or DVD format, or (heaven forbid) Betamax. The distributors are making a bundle on repackaging old stuff. Regarding the economic impact of file sharing and piracy, the only thing clear is that nothing is clear.
But shouldn’t “Thou Shalt Not Steal” trump all other concerns? We do have to consider the artist’s right to gain income from her intellectual property. And even though it’s hard to like some of those others who stand to profit, the mogols, the agents, the huge companies, we have to think of their rights too.
What’s considered improper from the perspective of Jewish law is not giving credit to the originator of an idea. The Talmud states (Megilla 15a) “One who quotes a statement in the name of its originator brings redemption to the world.”
Improper, yes – but not necessarily illegal.
Beyond that, the jury is out. Freedom reigns, no matter how much the mogols try to rein it in. As for me, I prefer to download legally and above board, appreciating the convenience and low-cost of iTunes.
Q. I just came from the store, having bought an mp3 player. When I opened it I noticed that they had given me a newer, enhanced model, not the one I had paid for. The store is about 25 miles away. To return it I would be spending as much on gas for the round trip as I would have spent had I purchased the newer model. What is the ethical thing to do?
A. Order online next time! That way you’ll spend nothing on gas, preserving our scarce energy resources, and you’ll feel less constrained about doing the right thing, which, BTW, would be to return the item.
It doesn’t matter if you’re dealing with a multinational corporation or a nine-year old’s lemonade stand. You paid for one thing and got another.
Let’s say you are in a checkout line at the local supermarket and the cashier gives you too much change. While scanners tend to reduce the likelihood of this happening, human error is still thankfully part of our commercial and social interactions. So who do you think will pay the price at the end of the day, when records are checked and the register is short. Messrs. A&P and Stop and Shop won’t feel the pain. But the cashier will.
So maybe the clerk at your store was having a bad day; maybe this error will be the one that seals his fate and sends him to the unemployment line. I think it would be worth a half a tank of gas to save a guy’s job, don’t you?
When the Talmud states that the first question we’ll be asked when we get to heaven is whether we conducted our business affairs honestly, that didn’t just apply to the seller. The buyer needs to be honest too, or the whole enterprise crumbles.
This is a case of “buyer beware” in reverse. Buyer, beware not to cheat the seller!

Tuesday, November 12, 2013

Hammerman on Ethics: The Complete Collection

HAMMERMAN ON ETHICS

You Broke It, You Own It, Own Up to It

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