TBE Bar/Bat Mitzvah Commentary, Zoom Video and Screen Shots: Jules Alexander on Bamidbar

 

TBE Torah Commentary, plus Zoom Recording and Screen Shots: Ilana and Madelyn Meth on Emor

 

MADELYN

Hello everybody. Shabbat shalom. 

As a lot of you may know, I was in Israel last summer. Little did I know what would happen a couple months later. The events of October 7th had a huge impact on me. It was such a terrible thing, and my heart will always be with the hostages and families of lost ones. 

But despite all the bad things that have happened, I have learned a lot about being Jewish, and this has helped me in finding my Jewish pride. I became very interested in my faith, and especially expanding my knowledge on the Holocaust. Even before my trip to Israel, my parents kept enforcing how important it is to have a proper, Jewish education. At the time, I had no idea why, and didn’t get why it was being stressed so much. Throughout 6th and 7th grade I have been to the Holocaust Museum in Washington, Yad Vashem (the Holocaust museum in Israel), the Holocaust Heritage Museum in Long Island, and even more importantly, visited Israel and marched in solidarity for Israel in Washington, DC.  Besides going to all these places, our family has a few Jewish traditions too. For example, we go to services from time to time, celebrate shabbat almost every Friday night, go to temple on high holidays, and have our annual dreidel tournaments. After October 7th, I have realized why these traditions and what I have learned about Judaism is so important to me and my family. 

Which brings me to my Torah portion, Emor. Emor contains the rules and guidelines to living a purposeful and structured life. In order to live a purposeful Jewish life, I believe that the rules are the most important part in making it meaningful. So, I like to follow the rules. Mainly because doing the right thing makes me feel proud, and good inside. For example, following the rules of Judaism because they make every day special. The holiday Shabbat happens every week. If you strictly observe the teachings of the Torah, you would give yourself a day of rest to disconnect from everything going on, and not use any electronics. Or, if you are Kosher, not mixing meat and dairy. Even though I am not completely observant of of Judaism, I enjoy celebrating the holidays in a less restrictive way, by following some of the rules. For example, I didn’t eat flour and bread for the whole time of Passover this year.  Even when my whole class was having a pizza party, I sat there and ate my matzah pizza. There are other rules too that play a big role in keeping an organized life. 

But the rules of Judaism aren’t just about holidays and the ways of living.   They are about how to treat one another.  The portion before this one has all kinds of laws about that, including the most important of all, love your neighbor as yourself.  By following these laws, we are making the world a better place

So, the teachings of the Torah can be very useful in having an organized, meaningful life. 

Which brings me to my mitzvah project, Hearts for Holit.  During October 7th, Hamas invaded a Kibbutz in Israel called Holit. Holit is located really close to Gaza, so it was not safe for the members to continue living there. They all were relocated to various housing in the north, where it is safest for them. On my trip to Israel, I learned that one of the key aspects of Kibbutz life is community. Now that they are all separated, community is one thing they don’t have. So, in my mitzvah project I am aiming to re- establish community by sponsoring monthly events or get - togethers for all the members. This project means a lot to me because my community is so important to me. When I was in Israel, I became a Bat Mitzvah on Masada, but I am doing it again here for my community so I could celebrate with them too. 

As I am celebrating with my community, I am also honored in sharing this Mitzvah with my Bat Mitzvah twin Miriam, with whom I share a Hebrew name. Mira unfortunately was not able to have one of her own when she perished in the Holocaust and was never able to reach this milestone. 

I am also sharing this day with my real twin, Ilana. Mazel tov and congratulations! You did so good!

ILANA

Shabbat Shalom and welcome to my Bat Mitzvah. Madelyn your speech was really good!

Even though I loved what you said about rule following, I’m going to talk about the opposite. Because I’m a bit of a “rule breaker.”

Even though following rules is really good, it’s also good to bend the rules sometimes.

This week’s Torah Portion talks about Rules. It talks about following rules and even breaking rules. What a coincidence that this applies to Madelyn and me.

We are both very different in many ways. Madelyn is a bit of a rulie, but me on the other hand I don’t like to play by the book.

And there are lots of rules worth arguing about.

My portion, for instance, contains laws about the priests, who led the people in worship.  The rules had nothing to do with what they did, but a lot to do with how they looked – and whether they had any disabilities or flaws.  I think it’s unfair to have rules like that.  But so did the Torah, because no such rules exist for any other kind of Jewish leader, like rabbis.  And many of the rules for priests set back then don’t apply anymore.

I think it’s important to break the rules from time to time because you can go down a new path and have it your own way.

If I had the chance, I’d rewrite some basic rules for school. For instance, who really needs homework?  I would write a new rule that there can’t be any homework and everything should be learned in school.  That would take a lot of pressure off kids so we can live wholesome lives.

Here’s another rule I would add to the Torah:  If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything.

There have been lots of times when Jews have had to break rules because they were living in places where the rulers were cruel and evil.  In Nazi Germany, for instance.  During the Holocaust, many Jews broke rules by hiding and many non-Jews put their lives at risk to hide them.

Sometimes it’s not easy to know what’s right and what’s wrong. 

But one thing I’ve learned this year is that right now, helping Israel is what’s right.  And remembering the victims of October 7 and the Holocaust.

 

When I was in Israel over the summer, we were lucky enough to visit an Air Force base in the Negev desert and we met some of the pilots and crew. When October 7th happened I was devastated and was thinking about them every day as they we’re flying missions over Gaza.

For my Bat mitzvah project I'm donating money to their base to help them buy supplies that they can use to de-stress between missions and take a break. I also decided to create goodie bags for all the pilots and crew that included stress balls with their logo on it.

You can have one too if you donate 36 dollars or more!

I’d like to ask Madelyn to join me back up here.

After October 7th people kept saying the term “Never forget,” which is the saying that used to refer to the Holocaust.

And today, by sharing our B'not Mitzvah with Mira and Hania, who were among the million and a half kids who died during the Holocaust, we are showing that that we will never forget, about both the Holocaust and October 7, in order to make sure that something like that never happens again.

TBE Bar/Bat Mitzvah Commentary: Grant Bradley on Tazria - D'var Torah, Zoom Video and Screen Shots

Shabbat Shalom!

Those of you who know me know that I have a real passion for basketball. So before I even get started, I need to give a big shout out to the UCONN Mens and Womens basketball teams for making Connecticut so proud and especially to the Men for winning back to back championships!  Now, how many of YOU know that former NBA player Moses Malone was named after our very own Moshe from the Torah. JUST KIDDING. But how many of you ACTUALLY do know that in 1979, the top rebounder in the NBA was Moses Malone?  At the ripe age of 10 I knew this and that’s how passionate I am about basketball.

But there’s another reason I love basketball, and, it has to do with my Torah portion, Tazria.

Yes, Tazria is all about leprosy!  But the beauty of Torah study is that you can find interesting things to say even about a portion that is all about the grossness of leprosy.  Not only that, but it even ties into my special interest – basketball.

Yes, I know leprosy is kind of disgusting and not everyone’s favorite topic, but I ended up with the portion that deals with disease. For anyone who doesn’t know, leprosy is sort of like Covid before Covid or AIDS before AIDS.  Very scary.  Very deadly. Very mysterious and very contagious.  Just like with both of these diseases, it’s the unknown that scares people so much and often drives people apart.

Basketball, on the other hand, brings people together.  So often, it has proven to be the cure for the disease – not necessarily in a medical sense but in many other ways. I love how basketball has done that, and it’s even done that for me.

Any old pick-up game brings people together who might not have known each other beforehand, and who might have very different backgrounds. Many times I have been on a court and asked people to play… people I don’t know, or don’t know well.  I can just tell they share my love of basketball.  It doesn’t matter whether you are Black or white, American or European, Asian or African – Australian or even Antarctican, young or old, tall or short…

Well, it helps to be tall – but there are some really great short players too.

But with all this good, there are situations in the world of basketball that has had to deal with disease and isolating people, just like in Tazria.

When Magic Johnson told the world that he was HIV positive in 1991, it shocked everyone, but the NBA stood behind him, just like the Kohen in ancient Israel. We learn in the Torah, that one of the jobs of the Kohen was to integrate the sick into the community. According to Eytz Chaim commentary, religion looked to include an inflicted person, not isolate them. Many people were scared of Magic Johnson at the time of his diagnosis. Much like one would be afraid to be around someone inflicted with leprosy. But eventually he was able to play in the 1992 Olympics on the Dream Team. Basketball acted as the Kohen for Magic Johnson, allowing him to integrate back into society.

In 2020, when Covid hit, the NBA was the first league to cancel its season, but they also were very quick to find a solution, by creating a bio-secure bubble to protect their players from catching and spreading this horrible virus.

In ancient Israel, the Kohen would care for the leprosy patient and bring that person back into society.  The Torah teaches us that we heal by not isolating people or treating them like strangers.

Basketball creates an ideal universe. On the court, everyone shares love for the same thing. The beautiful game. Sure there might be fouls and arguments but when you step off that court you shake hands like nothing but a good game happened.  When the messiah comes, I believe everyone will play basketball all the time. Even the mashiach will play basketball.

And you won’t even have to be tall!

I wanted to take my love for basketball and do something good. For my mitzvah project, I’m collecting basketballs and monetary donations to give to the Boys and Girls Club of Stamford. They are always in need of equipment and I want to help keep their sports bins full. Every day, too many kids in Connecticut and around the country leave school with nowhere to go. The Boys and Girls Club of Stamford makes sure that the kids in our city ALWAYS have a place to be with people that care for them. 

Thank you everyone for being here today to celebrate. 

TBE Bar/Bat Mitzvah Commentary, Video and Screen Shots: Joshua Friedman on Shabbat Zachor

Shabbat Shalom!

Today is a special Shabbat called Shabbat Zachor.  It means the Sabbath of Remembrance. So what are supposed to remember?  We are supposed to remember what the evil nation of Amalek did to the Jewish people after they escaped many years of slavery in Egypt.  The Jewish people finally escaped Egypt after being slaves to Pharaoh for many years.  They were walking through the desert, hungry, thirsty, hot, and tired, and suddenly, this group of bullies called Amalekites attacked them, especially those people who were in the back and were tired and weak.  Why did they attack them?  We don’t know - maybe it’s out of fear or jealousy or maybe they were just scared of the Jewish people because they were different. After this attack, God says that we should always remember what Amalek did and “blot out Amalek’s name”. It's a way of saying that there are consequences for being mean and attacking others, and sometimes you have to take strong action to make sure it doesn't happen again. However, is violence always the best solution?  Aren’t there other ways to work things out? 

 

The story of Amalek reminds me of the theme of fighting against really bad leaders who hurt others for their own power.  Evil leaders like Hamas who attacked Israel on October 7, 2023.  Hamas is a terrorist organization and they killed at least 1,200 men, women, children, and infants in one single day.  It was the largest and most brutal massacre of Jews since the Holocaust. I remember hearing this news and couldn’t believe it.  I was just in Israel a few months earlier for the first time with my family and got to meet my cousins who live in Israel. I was so worried Hamas would hurt them because they were attacking so many innocent families in such an evil way.  Like the nation of Amalek, Hamas believes that the Jewish people should be destroyed and will not stop until that happens.  Hearing this makes me feel scared.  How could this be happening today? Could this happen to me?  There are not many Jewish people in my school and I remember wearing my “Stand for Israel” sweatshirt the day after I went to the Washington DC rally feeling very proud.  Another boy pointed it out and made a rude comment and I could respond one of two ways “fight back” or “ask them why they said what they said”.  I chose the latter and it threw him off that I was calm and wanted to have a conversation about it.  They didn’t have a response.  It made me realize that sometimes people have no reason for being mad or not liking someone and instead of figuring it out, they take the easy path by being angry.

There are so many sides to what is happening in Israel and it is very confusing to me that people could hate the Jewish people so much that they celebrated when they hurt or killed innocent people in such violent ways, even children who are my age or younger.   But then I think about the Palestinians who have to live with Hamas as their leader and what’s happening to the Palestinians.  It also isn’t fair since they are caught in the middle and are now dying from starvation and the war.  So in this situation, are we supposed to wipe out the memory of Hamas, similar to wiping out the memory of Amalek, by wiping out all who support Hamas?  Many people think that Israel is trying to do that.  They think that Israel wants to kill an entire population of people and they are being blamed for defending themselves.  Israel is often seen as the “evil one”. 

In my opinion, Israelis should have the right to defend themselves and rescue the people who were taken hostage.  They should have the right to stand up against an organization that is filled with so much evil against the Jewish people but at the same, I just wish the solution wasn’t war.  But Israel is left with not many choices since Hamas won’t agree to the cease-fire.  And so it gets very tricky. 

Nothing good comes from fighting.  It causes so much unnecessary stress.  Disagreements with friends and even with our own family happen all of the time but holding grudges never solves any problems.  If there is someone you have been upset with then talk it out. Just remember that we can’t change the past.  We can only move forward.  Give people the benefit of the doubt, have empathy, and listen so we can spend more time spreading kindness and less time waking up being mad.  Do things you can control like doing good in this world, which could be our way of destroying the idea of Amalek. 

And that brings me to my Mitzvah Project, Lasagna Love, which is all about spreading kindness, one lasagna at a time.  Lasagna Love’s mission is to do small acts of kindness that can make a big difference in someone’s life.  For people who might have lost a loved one, who just came out of the hospital, or are having trouble making ends meet, they can request a lasagna. No questions asked!  So every week or so, we are matched with a family in the area who just needs a delicious home-cooked meal.  This little act of kindness can make a big difference. We have helped families where the mom has MS and just wants a break from cooking for her kids, another person who just got out of the hospital and lives by herself so having a home-cooked meal brought a smile to her face, and another family who just immigrated to the United States and never had lasagna before so they wanted to see what all the hype was about!  Families are so grateful for the support and I love being able to help my neighbors that I didn’t even know before!  By the way, Lasagna Love is a national organization so even if you don’t live in Connecticut,  please check it out for your local community and spread the love of a delicious lasagna for a family in need!

In This Moment: The Face of UNRWA; the Face of the Stranger; TBE's B'nai Mitzvah Booklets

 

In This Moment The Face of UNRWA The latest from Eretz Nehederet Here's the problem with the UNRWA scandal. There is documented proof that at least a dozen of these UN workers participated in the massacres of October 7. Like the clergy sex-abuse scandals that have struck the Boston archdiocese and other religious groups, it is almost impossible to gain trust back after such a betrayal. If relief agencies moonlight in terrorism, the ultimate losers are the innocent people whose lives depend on them. For that reveals a painful truth. Now that we've got the goods on them, we can't live without them. As Ha'aretz's Anshel Pfeiffer noted, UNRWA Is riddled with Hamas, but Israel has no alternative. Israel is not about to suspend its ties with UNRWA. It certainly can't do that after the International Court of Justice ruling on Friday, warning Israel that denying humanitarian assistance to Gaza could be constituted as an act of genocide. Unless the Israel Defense Forces decides it wants to distribute the food, water and medical supplies to over 2 million Palestinians in Gaza, it needs UNRWA to do it. So how can Israel work with these people? It will happen because it has to happen. But a world that now has seen the evidence of this complicity, as well as the complicity of hospitals, schools and mosques, is shifting the ground, even as Israel fights off false accusations of genocide. Nine countries paused funding when this news came out. Last I checked, nine is nine more than zero. Beneath the surface - literally - the truth of Hamas's reign of terror is slowly emerging, being flushed out by this filthy but necessary operation, just as the tunnels are themselves being flushed out with seawater. And the weary Gazans themselves are starting to say the quiet part out loud. They want to be rid of Hamas. I don't know whether the P.A. can be reformed - but can the U.N.? See also - With Gazans starving and freezing, the US withholding funds from UNRWA is unconscionable (Forward) Wed on JBS / Cablevision channel 138 Remembering Mark Golub See the preview below. I was honored to participate in this tribute, which will be aired on Mark's first yahrzeit, Wed Jan. 31 from 8-10 PM on JBS (Optimum channel 138). Wednesday's Front Pages Jerusalem Post Ha'aretz Yediot Ahronot The Face of the Stranger This Friday at services, join us as we welcome guests from Building One Community. On Refugee Shabbat, we pause to acknowledge and honor the hard work of pursuing justice, and to recommit our resources moving forward. As always, we raise our voices together as a Jewish community to say that we will welcome and protect those seeking safety from violence and persecution. At the beginning of this week's Torah portion of Yitro, we meet Moses’ children: Gershom and Eliezer. Gershom’s name is explicitly from the Hebrew words “ger” and “sham” – glossed in the text as meaning, “I was a stranger in a foreign land.” Moses’s “strangeness” – an Israelite among the Egyptians, an Egyptian among the Midianites, is highlighted here, just before he facilitates the most profound experience of human-Divine connection in the Bible, the giving of the Torah. Following in the path of Moses, Jews have been “strangers” in many lands and over many centuries.  And now in Israel, hundreds of thousands of Israelis are displaced and unable to return to their homes, in the south and along the northern border. Many have no home left to go back to. At a time when 110 million are displaced worldwide, from wars, persecution, poverty or climate - we need, more than ever, to see God in the face of the stranger. Join us this Friday evening as we, along with many other synagogues, observe HIAS Refugee Shabbat. Another TBE Memory B'nai Mitzvah Booklets I'm a collector, and I don't think anything I've collected during my time at TBE has as much personal meaning as all the B'nai Mitzvah booklets created by our families over the years. I was inspired to incorporate this family project into the experience by a mentor, Rabbi Gary Glickstein, who did something similar in Worcester, Mass. My goal was to use the booklets to help introduce this newly minted Jewish adult to their family and to the community in a way that could be fun and deeply meaningful. Few congregations that I knew of were doing this, at least so elaborately, so I felt like we were inventing the wheel. From the start (which was in my prior congregation), we had the "All About Me" (autobiographical sketch), a family tree, letters, artwork, photos, a "scorecard" of the honors, a description of the mitzvah project which in the early years would also include a Soviet or Holocaust "twin." I'd usually put in a summary of the Torah portion and possibly some supplementary background material about an upcoming holiday or historical anniversary. As you can see from the montage above, each booklet is unique - as unique and special as each of our precious students. And not just the kids. The personal letters written by parents and grandparents found in these booklets are also collector's items. I often refer to them at other lifecycle moments. When parents first heard about them, a few complained, but once they saw the results, they loved it, despite the toil. I know I spent hours and hours working on my kids' booklets. We've had families research their family trees back to the middle ages; my favorite was the family that had the medieval sage Rashi on one side of their tree - and Daniel Boone on the other! Here's a call out to all our TBE b'nai mitzvah from the past four decades: Let me know how you are doing! What is your favorite memory of your TBE B'nai Mitzvah? One thing all those students share is having had a booklet; THE hallmark of a TBE B'nai Mitzvah. Believe it or not, I fit the hundreds of booklets I've saved into a single large box, each and every one. While many files and books will be remaining at my new office in TBE, these booklets will be coming with me to Madison. I'll reach over from time to time and pick out a few randomly, flip through the pages, think of the kids, and smile. Recommended Reading When Natan Gross became Ma'ayan Gross—and continued to serve in their Original Unit (Israel from the Inside - Gordis) GAZA WAR DAY 116: Hostage Deal? Water in the Tunnels, Jenin (Marc Schulman) - There now appears to be a genuine possibility to make a deal, albeit only a possibility. The current discussion is focused on the first phase, which would involve a significant reduction in hostilities. In exchange, the sick, elderly, and women would be released. In return, a certain number of prisoners held in Israeli jails would be freed, although the exact number is unclear. Foreign media reports suggest around 2,000 prisoners in the first stage. At this moment, right-wing elements of the government, namely Smotrich and Ben-Gvir, have stated their intent to bring down the coalition if terrorists with blood on their hands are released. They also threaten to topple the government if Israel’s military action in Gaza is halted. As a result of these threats, Netanyahu delivered a speech today asserting that Israel will not cease fighting in Gaza until achieving complete victory over Hamas and will not release thousands of prisoners. As usual, Netanyahu seems to be telling different people different things: on the one hand, Netanyahu allowed negotiators to potentially consider an agreement that would allow the release of a significant numbers of prisoners; on the other hand, this same Netanyahu, in speaking to the right-wing audiences declares that such releases will not happen. Tovah Feldshuh, Debra Messing and more Jewish stars perform at first-ever ‘Shabbat on Broadway’ service (JTA) Feds charge Massachusetts man for calls threatening Jews with ‘genocide’ (JTA) My Fellow Palestinians: It's Time to Get Rid of Our Leaders and Accept Israel's Offers for Peace (Newsweek) Trapped by Trauma: Transcending the Dragon’s Gaze (Irwin Kula) - We can not fix the issues around this violent conflict with explicit first-level correctives because that is not where these issues live – though stopping the present eruption of violence is an absolute priority. The issues inhabit raw scars of previous generations, in things that happened so that we could actually be here and now…alas, we are here and now in trauma, suspicion, and bitterness that has grown in wounds that have never healed. The International Court of Justice ruling on Israel got it right (Forward - Jay Michaelson) - Israel is neither the genocidal demon I see regularly depicted in far-left social media posts, nor the blameless angel I see depicted in many pro-Israel ones. Oct. 7 was a horror, Hamas’s use of sexual violence was a horror, all civilian hostages should be immediately released without conditions and an Israeli military response is justified. And also: the suffering in Gaza is appalling, and millions of Israelis and American Jews are rightly dismayed at the ways in which this response has unfolded. There is plausible cause for concern. And if both sides can find something wrong with today’s ICJ ruling, that’s a good sign that it’s correct. My argument with Michaelson is that, yes, the suffering in Gaza is appalling, but that Hamas deserved a large proportion of the blame for that as well. Any suggestion that acts of genocide are happening there (and they aren't) must take Hamas's complicity into account. But we should not be arguing either that the Gazans aren't suffering as. much as claimed (even if the death counts come from questionable sources) or that Israel is blameless. ‘It depends on the context’. Harvard plunges into roiling debate about what is considered antisemitism. (Boston Globe) Rabbi Art Green, prominent scholar of Hasidic Judaism, is barred from Hebrew College following sexual misconduct allegation (JTA) Temple Beth El 350 Roxbury Road Stamford, Connecticut 06902 203-322-6901 | www.tbe.org    A Conservative, Inclusive, Spiritual Community

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